Practice for the Holidays

Every Awful Conversation You've Had With Relatives About Your Career!

TIPS of the TRADE: Kissing on Stage or Screen

When asked
what it was like to kiss young Leonardo Dicaprio in the 1995 movie, The Quick and the Dead, Sharon Stone said,

"It was about as sexy as kissing my arm."

That's why I love Sharon. Her acting skills are hit or miss (great in Casino, awful in Gloria) but she doesn't pull her punches and get all PC on everybody.

The funny thing is that back then was pretty much a boy - I remember not understanding all the leading man hoopla about him in Titanic - he looked twelve to me.

But old Leo sure has filled out quite nicely hasn't he? (She said in a distinctly cougar-ish tone) And rumor has it that he's perfected his tonsil-hockey technique by now. I'll bet Sharon wouldn't mind giving him a second chance, don't you?

I found a cool article that touches on the subject of what kissing looks hot in films ...

Kissing tips: Learn from the top 10 best kissing scenes in movies

... but as actors, we need to approach it from the actual TECHNIQUE of kissing on the stage or in front of the cameras. I've done it on stage and in a couple of indie films and I have to say ... it was REALLY EMBARRASSING.

I have been very lucky as all the guys were all quite adorable. In one staged reading, I was playing opposite a character actor I'd known a long time who was not really looked upon as a leading man - which was the whole point of the script. The guy you least suspect.

They're business partners and towards the end of the play, he finally kisses her. Not a "movie star" kiss but definitely one that said - we are no longer "just friends." 

Well, as is often the case, we never actually rehearsed the "kiss", in read-throughs we would just say, "and then we, y'know, kiss." So, finally, in the actual performance we get to that point in the script and it got real quiet and the thought flashed through my mind, "Gee, we should really have rehearsed this damn kiss."

And just when I thought, "could this get any more AWKWARD" he just leaned over and kissed me in a way that made the audience hush.

It was electric.

Sadly, he never got to play the role. His wife wouldn't let him.

Which spurs a lot of questions.


What IS chemistry?
Can you anticipate it? Can create it when it's not there? If so, how?  


WHEN DO YOU STOP???  
You don't want to ruin the scene or the take but you also don't want seem like you're really kissing the ACTOR - just the CHARACTER.

Is tongue EVER appropriate? 
I mean, it doesn't show or anything. But you also don't want it to be so pristine that it looks like you're kissing your Aunt Lucille.


Bad breath - take after take after take.
Arrrrghhhh! And what's worse, what if it's YOUR bad breath????


If you're a good kisser in life 
... does it assure you that you'll also be one on film?


Ever have to kiss someone you despise?
How did you do it? Any mind trick you can share with us?


What about gay kissing if you happen to be straight?

Or straight kissing when you are most decidedly gay? (I kissed a girl once in a play - I remember thinking - "Wow, girls' lips are sooo soft.".)


What about sex? 
Yeah, what about it? Have you ever had to do a sex scene in a film or play? If so, how did you approach it?  Do tell.

       And after all this, 

                                    can a kiss ever still be ... a kiss?

Please share with us your thoughts or experience? Can you share any tips with a fellow actor?

ON A ROLE: The Part That GOT Away

Back in 1982, I was starting out and struggling to get a legit agent when I came across a casting call in Backstage looking for a woman who sounded like something I could play the hell out of. It was called The King of Comedy and gave Alan King's office as the contact point, so I sent off a picture and resume and hoped for the best.

Image via WikipediaA week or so later, I actually got a call from Alan King's receptionist telling me that she was sorry but that the casting call was erroneously attributed to them. I thought that was VERY sweet of her to take the time to call me given the way the business can be - and thanked her.

I did some more research - and this was BEFORE the Google - and discovered that it was Martin Scorcese's office who had put out the call. And that it was to star Robert DeNiro and Jerry Lewis - TWO idols of mine. (Yes, I idolized Jerry Lewis - and I wasn't even French!)

Oh my GOD. I had to be seen for this. I sent off another pic & resume. I called an agent I knew and begged him to submit me. And waited.  Nothing.

Then I got an odd idea. I knew DeNiro had offices at The Mayflower Hotel so I decided to send him some unusual snail mail. One was a silly outtake of me in a bikini making a stupid muscle man pose. With it I sent a card that listed the character's qualities and how I matched them.

Then, for some odd reason, I also sent him a greeting card and wrote on it in a very chatty, familiar style as if I knew him very well. (I did not.) It was something like this:

"Hi Bobby,
 How're ya doin? How are thing's going? How's the family. How are you doing with the weight, huh? (It was just after Raging Bull) I'll bet that's a pain in the ass to take off. Everything's fine here. My nephew needed some surgery on his penis, but he's fine now. Mom says "hi."

That sort of thing. The weird part is - i hadn't read the script and only found out later that those were the same kind of letters the character was sending to the Jerry Lewis character. Oddly, it worked. A week later I got a call from Cis Corman's office asking me to come in "at Bob's request." I was a nervous wreck. I chose to wear these crazy overalls I had and a long fur coat. I met with Cis and read a script she handed me. It was the scene where the obsessed Masha character ties up Jerry Lewis (Langford in the movie) and tries to seduce him. I have no idea what the HELL I did but she seemed to like it.

"Look, Fran, it's a long shot. We have it narrowed down to three women who've been auditioning for a long time ... but, I like you. I'm gonna take a chance and bring you in on this. Here are the sides, come back in two weeks."

I came back. Read for Cis again.

And again.

And again. But THIS time it was to be for "Marty" - with me acting with "Bobby."

Cover of Robert De NiroBobby.

Me and Bobby.

Me and Bobby acting together.

I was a mess. I shared this with my mother in New Jersey. And my mother responded by giving me a cardboard box that contained three "Raging Bulls" she had cut out of fake fur.


"There's magnets on the back so they can put them on their fridge. I made three, one for Marty, Bobby and Cis so no one feels left out. Promise me you'll give it to them."

Okay, not the support I was hoping for but it did help with my nerves. I now had a new mission. Mom seemed way more chummy with these folks than I so I figured if all else fails, I'll give them the bulls so it's not a total loss. Plus, I'd never hear the end of it if I didn't.

Image via WikipediaThe big day arrived and when Cis let me into their suite at the Mayflower, she had some bad news. Marty was sick. BUT, the good news was ... Bobby wanted to fill in for him.

AArgh. Instead of acting WITH Robert DeNiro, which we all know only makes you that much better - I will be acting FOR Robert DeNiro. Instead of me seducing Bobby DeNiro, I will be seducing Cis Corman with Bobby DeNiro watching me closely through the lens of a camera.

I have to say, it threw me. I did my best but felt awkward seducing a middle-aged woman (I know, I know - I'm an ACTRESS. It shouldn't matter ...but it did) When it was over, I was actually relieved.

Both Bobby and Cis were very cordial and so, as I was packing up to leave, I debated. Should I? Ah, why the hell not?

"UM, look, before I go I promised my mother I would give these to you." I took the three fur bulls out of the box and handed them to Bob and Cis. They smiled graciously and carefully unwrapped the tissue paper.  "They're Raging Bulls. They're for your fridge. My mother made me do this."

They actually seemed touched and genuinely thanked me. I left feeling as though I had accomplished something after all.

AFTERMATH:
Image via WikipediaObviously, Sandra Bernhard got the role which launched her career. In an interview Scorcese said she had "sexual menace."  I knew I did not have "sexual menace" that's for sure.

Luckily, Cis Corman did remember me though and called me in often after that.






Almost a year after the audition, I came across a roped off intersection in Manhattan and a bunch of trailers. I saw a crew member I knew and asked who was shooting. "Scorcese and DeNiro's new film."
Ah, how apropos.  I laughed and told him of my audition fiasco.

He turned to me and said, "That bull is yours? He has it on his file cabinet in the trailer. I swear to God!"


Nice guy, that Bobby.

ACTOR'S NIGHTMARE:: I can't believe this actually happened onstage!

Must THIS show go on?

A true story once told to me by another actor was of a two character play being performed Off Off OFF Broadway. It was a romantic piece and the scene was of the innocent young man and woman sitting awkwardly moving towards their first kiss. It was a minimal set and they were just sitting in chairs facing each other.

As the moment for the kiss grew closer, the actor noticed that the actress had a funny look on her face. And a moment later, she projectile vomited all over him.

Oh GOD. Can you IMAGINE????

The poor girl had come down with something suddenly. We've all had that happen - but ...

... ON STAGE?

ALL OVER THE GUY?

 I mean, we all know the show must go on ... but would anyone want THIS one to?

Okay, so that's my story of bizarre theatre lore. Have you heard of any other crazy things that happened on stage during a performance?

DO TELL!